The All Seeing Eye is watching you...

Hi - I have loved this site for a long time. First time poster. Typing one handed. Not! LOL! Listen, I know it sounds crazy, but I was tagged with a human-implantable tracking device as a baby in the 1970s. My brothers had natural births at home but I was delivered in the hospital. Whilst they both have high-flying careers and beautiful families, my life has been defined by a spiral of drug abuse and manic depression. All my friends turned on me in high school and since then I have been sacked repeatedly from dead-end jobs and dumped by every ugly girl who was medicated enough to sleep with me. Everyone I meet tries to fuck with my head. I have the sensation of being followed constantly and every time I take a crap I feel like there is someone watching FROM INSIDE THE BOWL. I thought that I had finally rid myself of the evil spychip when I cut off my left hand a couple of years ago but the mind games have got worse. Can anyone help? Was this not prophesied in the Bible? Whose laughing now? Not ME!!!

I hate to disappoint you, Skull, but the Book of Richard states that we will receive the number of the beast on our right hand. I guess that your piano-playing days are over, dude.

A program of mass surveillance is underway in our homes. I am convinced that a number of big companies are locked into a conspiracy with the goverment to install bugging devices in their products. I am particularly suspicious of those plug-in air fresheners that my mother buys... why do they need to be attached to the electricity supply? Lavender is a scent of social control.

Let me guess, Bildeberg. You're a live-at-home virgin who still masturbates over his mother. Exercise videos and professional wrestling excite you but you're too much of a pussy to come out so masquerading as a misunderstood new-age goth. You use conspiracy theories as a defense mechanism to hide from the horrific truth that you are already dead inside... etc. etc. Close to the mark?

Wow, where's all the rage come from Chupacabra! Chill out, brother! Things are dreadful, but that doesn't make them terminal. LMFAO.

Sorry, I gave up rehab yesterday... I'm really loaded on antis.

I thought that you guys understood. I'm running the bath... this is Bildeberg signing off one last time...

Shit, I was only messing with you, Bildeberg.

Are you there, Bildeberg?